The Work
What to expect
Although I specialize in working with couples, I welcome single clients. Whether or not you’re currently partnered, our work cultivates self-awareness and relational mindfulness, essential ingredients for personal growth and fulfilling relationships.
I provide a non-judgmental space where you’re invited to bring your whole self, even the embarrassing stuff. From the start, we establish your goals and intentions and I guide you towards them with presence, creativity, challenge, and compassion.
Our work is relational, exploring through multiple modalities including RLT, Relational Life Therapy to build internal trust and resilience while confronting and replacing unwanted but sticky habits. The work is experiential and practical, while leaving space for surprise and mystery to inform us.
You’ll gain an understanding about what’s holding you back from intimacy and I’ll help you develop skills to nurture your vision for healthy relationships and a fulfilling erotic life. I’ll teach you how to remember love and stay kind to yourself and others, even under stress. Together, we find compassion for the fact that we’re human and will never get intimacy right 100% of the time.
Why Somatics?
Somatic coaching supports thriving by connecting us to our whole Self – body, heart, mind, and spirit. Somatic learning moves our attention from focusing mostly on cognition to include our bodies, where we slow down to get there faster.
Talk therapy can help us understand ourselves, but it is often not enough to sustain lasting change. Deeply entrenched patterns can only be met and integrated through our bodies. The state of our nervous system dictates our availability for intimacy and nourishing pleasure, not our mind.
Together, we’ll meet your body in present time, discovering and following subtle cues often missed in the rush of daily life. Tuning into your sensations might feel unfamiliar at first, but following your body’s moment-to-moment curiosities and impulses nurtures your connection with yourself, builds confidence, and establishes healthy neurological pathways for continued growth outside of sessions.
You are invited to feel everything, no matter how big or small. All emotions, wounds, traumas, sensations, pleasure, and curiosities have the space to express and be known. We use breath, sound, movement, mindfulness, and sometimes touch as tools to reconnect you to the most essential parts of yourself.
While I’m your guide, you are your greatest teacher. We trust the intelligence of your intentions, pleasure, pain, and protections to inform the pace and content of our work. I have no agenda outside of your stated goals and although it’s my job to lovingly challenge you along the way, nothing ever needs to happen.
What about Eros?
Erotic energy can literally generate life, but Eros is much more than sex. Eros is raw power, fueling the creativity we bring to our entire lives. When used rightly, its dynamic and unpredictable expression can stimulate our sense of discovery, wildness, and belonging. Misused or manipulated, it can break our hearts and cut us off from our vitality.
As social beings, our sexuality is influenced by culture – a mostly toxic mix of unrealistic standards that fail to recognize, let alone celebrate, our erotic nature. Early education never mentions pleasure and rarely goes beyond basic anatomy and scare tactics. Media and porn sell stories that hardly match reality. Well-meaning families and religious communities are often driven by fear and control, shaping us towards inauthenticity, diminished self-expression, and disconnection from our bodies.
Our work uproots the stories and learned behaviors that provoke confusion and shame, empowering you to choose whether to carry them forward. We dig deep to unwind the trauma stuck in your system, if that’s what you’re here for. Along the way, I’ll encourage you to explore your authentic and ever-changing erotic shape, value your pleasure, and teach you practical skills for self-discovery. If partnered, I’ll guide you in navigating this terrain together.
When you understand how you were shaped, untangle what blocks you from love, and learn to trust your animal body, you’ll feel more connected to your aliveness. You’ll be better equipped to face challenges and live your greatest life, in service to love, family, community, and the world.
A note on Trauma:
Working somatically is particularly effective for healing trauma. Sexual wounds embed in your body’s tissues and responses so that even when your mind says yes, your body may say no, or vice versa. This can be confusing, especially if you’ve done the psychological work to understand and forgive. Your body needs an environment that is safe enough to meet, feel, and accept the holding patterns that are living in you so that you can begin to unwind them. By moving slowly and attuning to your body’s present time needs, your sessions with me may help you contact, reveal and heal old wounds, restoring your inherent wellness and expanding your body’s capacity for pleasure.
